By: Beverly Thomassian
Gung Hay Fat Choy.
Every Chinese New Year brings a wave of gratitude for Alex and Ying, who welcomed an akward 14-year-old into their family-style restaurant and made her feel loved and cared for. Their generosity and belief in me left a lasting imprint on my heart.
I invite you to enjoy this excerpt from my recent book Healing through Connection for Healthcare Professionals. Join Coach Beverly for an intimate virtual interview on the writing of this book on Feb. 20 at 11:30am PST.
When I was fourteen and a half, I found refuge in an unexpected place—a small Chinese restaurant tucked between a Kinney Shoe Store and an Italian eatery in a strip mall in the San Fernando Valley. While my home life was unraveling, I was quietly being stitched back together behind the counter at Ying’s Kitchen.
I didn’t know it then, but this restaurant would do more than offer me a paycheck. It would shape my work ethic, show me what being part of a team meant, and serve as a foundation for the healthcare professional I would one day become. In that busy kitchen filled with the scent of onions and sizzling oil, I learned the beauty of hard work—and the profound healing that comes when someone believes in you.
Finding Refuge in Ying’s Kitchen
As the latest in the long line of high school girls, my job was to answer phones, bag the food, ring up the orders, and answer customer questions for $1.25 an hour. Barely a teenager with no restaurant experience, I approached my assigned tasks with a combination of diligence and confusion.
Early on, I stumbled. Anne, a high school senior in charge of training me, told me, in no uncertain terms, that I was “not keeping pace with the training program, and they might let me go.” This awkward coaching session is seared into my brain. It pushed me into high gear, and I became determined to be the best Ying’s Kitchen employee ever! That moment lit a fire in me. I doubled down, became the fastest phone answerer in the West Valley, and soon trained the new hires myself. It was more than pride, it was survival. A sense of belonging, and a safe place to grow.
Beyond being my employers, Alex and Ying looked out for me. Alex asked me about my day at school and practiced Chinese with me. Before closing, he would ask me if I was hungry. My favorites were the pork fried rice and the egg rolls, and on special nights, he would make me moo goo gai pan. During the summer, Alex coached me on the importance of drinking hot water to cool down. He asked me about my boyfriends and made sure I was keeping up with my homework. Best of all, he always smiled, showing his one gold tooth when I walked through the door.
His wife, Ying, only spoke a few words of English, but she had a way of letting me know she saw me. During springtime, she would call me over and take one strand of my hair, wrapping it carefully around a Jasmine flower from her yard. As I walked through my work shift, I could smell the scent of jasmine and know that I had a found family who treasured me.
Post-Traumatic Growth in Practice
In their book What Happened to You, Oprah Winfrey and Dr. Bruce Perry describe how post-traumatic growth can emerge when safe adults and healing relationships interrupt a cycle of pain. I am living proof of that truth.
Working at Ying’s Kitchen didn’t erase the pain of my past, but it gave me the structure, accountability, and connection I needed to believe in a future beyond it. It became the cornerstone of how I eventually built Diabetes Education Services—a company whose mission is rooted in decreasing shame and blame in diabetes care. The resilience, empathy, and grit that carried me through adolescence now fuel my passion for advocating person-centered, trauma-informed healthcare.
What This Means for Healthcare Professionals
As healthcare professionals, we may look for sophisticated solutions to complex human problems. But sometimes, the most transformative interventions are also the simplest: a steady routine, a safe space, and someone who believes in you.
This is especially true for people living with diabetes and other chronic conditions. Many carry unspoken histories of trauma. When we show up with kindness, curiosity, and consistency, we’re not just delivering care—we’re becoming part of someone’s healing journey.
Whether you’re precepting a student, mentoring a colleague, or counseling a patient, consider the ripple effect of your presence. Like Alex and Ying, you might be offering more than a service—you could be anchoring someone in a storm.
From Survival to Service
Looking back, I see how Alex and Ying laid the groundwork for how I lead today. Those years at Ying’s Kitchen profoundly shaped how I built and now manage my company. The lessons of diligence and love became my guiding light, helping me navigate even the roughest waters and steer my ship toward calmer horizons. The discipline I learned behind that counter still guides how I show up—whether teaching a course, writing a book, or sitting with someone in their hardest moment.
While my early life was shaped by adversity, the safe haven of Ying’s Kitchen taught me that healing often begins with being seen. That’s something we can all offer, no matter our title or training.
Sometimes, the most profound lessons in healing don’t come from textbooks—they come from trusted adults, jasmine flowers, and the quiet grace of being loved into wholeness.
Healing through Connection by Coach Beverly Thomassian now available in print, Audible and Kindle versions.
Paperback version with quantity discounts for you and your team
Audible and Kindle Version on Amazon
Write Your Review of Healing through Connection Here>>
Why Join?
Because you deserve a space to rest, reflect, and reconnect — not just with others, but with yourself. Together, we can remind one another of the humanity behind the healthcare, and rediscover the power of connection in healing.
Your presence matters. Your story matters. And we’re honored to walk this journey with you.
💖 Thank you for being a part of Healing Through Connection.
Join Coach Beverly for a Virtual Interview and Heartfelt Conversation
Feb. 20th at 11:30.
“Healing Through Connection for Health Care Professionals.”
Coach Beverly is thrilled to invite you to this special gathering and celebration. During this virtual book launch, a special guest interviewer will join Coach Bev for a heartfelt conversation about why this book matters now and the real stories from clinical practice that inspired it.
Coach Bev will also share the personal journey of writing Healing through Connection and how she discovered her voice along the way. We will conclude with an interactive question-and-answer session and allow time for connection.
Come celebrate connection, healing, and the power of story as we honor the shared human experience at the heart of healthcare.
